Addendum

This is important for me to clarify because I did not do a good job while writing in anger earlier:

I like conversations. I don’t like binary issues and I don’t like name calling. It’s horrible to watch this devolve into an issue of “oversensitive [insert feminist insult here]” vs “ignorent pigs.” I gave my read on the chart, and people are willing to disagree. I hope you will feel free to message me here and speak with me more if you would like to. I responded in the manner I did to the person who messaged me because I was upset by the presentation of the criticism and because I was honestly offended by her arguments, as I outlined (most specifically the “woman’s instability,” that had me seeing red and made me launch a response I otherwise would have swallowed). I feel they do any conversation on the subject a disservice. 

I think this chart is important and interesting because it can be taken in so many ways, the motives are not clear (I may be very wrong in the read I brought to it) and because it illustrates a lot of how people feel about gender relations. There is a lot of bad conversation about dating out there, a lot of unhelpful, divisive conversation out there. I had hoped for my response to elicit something more nuanced, but perhaps it did more harm than good and for that I am profoundly sorry. I did not mean to hurt anybody’s feelings and I do not condone any of the hateful things in either direction said in any of the comments. 

And finally, because of poor writing on my part, I need to further clarify a point from my response about all courtship being manipulation. I mean that word without negative connotation. When you like somebody, you (consciously or not) do things that will have the person like you, you accomodate them, you try to position yourself as best you can to impress or to get to know them. That is manipulation in its neutral sense, and I don’t think there is always a moral component to it, which is why I said the goal and the method are what really matter.